Monday, April 14, 2008

Do not believe everything your child says

I wasted 2 hours on Saturday trying to access a website for my 5 year old son, who's magic code was rejected. He insisted to me that his user name was "Bobthe". I could not get him on line and sent 6 e mails requesting help. I got 6 replies today and his user name was a very bad spelling of chocolate cake. I am going to buy him one and let him eat it all!!!!

When he returns from his father he claims he is starving having eaten nothing for 2 days, that he can go to bed when he likes etc.

Children sometimes forget, sometimes make things up and sometimes lie. It is best to filter what they tell you, and if anything causes concern then to raise it with your ex partner in a non confrontational manner.

Different households have different rules. Give your children a break. They may come back from dad's and slam the fridge door because that is the only way it closes at dad's. They may forget to take their shoes off because mum does not make them. They may leave the toilet seat up because they have been visiting dad! Imagine how hard it is for children having to learn 2 sets of rules - none of which are their own!!!!!

3 comments:

Nicey said...

Your right, Its not THAT easy being a kid, nice blog, keep it going

Lily said...

It is hard having two different sets of rules from two different households. The rules aren't too different, but his father lets him stay up much later than I do. Divorce is so confusing for the children, but it doesn't have to be...

Amy
www.lilysdivorce.com

Anonymous said...

Not only confusing for the children but dad too!!!

For us Dad's who only get one day a week or a fortnight with our children is there any point in inflicting any rules at all onto our offspring? Surely it should be a day of fun and a chance for us to do the things we wouldn't normally do like go to a theme park, go and catch crabs, eat all the wrong foods and generally act like a 10 year old again.

I cannot believe the stress my eldest has put himself under with his SAT tests which start next week and my youngest has to go for a brain scan so that puts everything into perspective. As long as your child behaves in an appropriate manner for his/her surroundings and is polite and courteous they why worry them with extra demands like a toilet seat, leaving cups in their bedrooms and a whole host of petty niggles. By the time they are teenagers they will be doing as they please pretty much anyway, I would suggest this is the time to start instilling some sort of discipline into the household.
Kids grow up fast enough as it is, let them be kids for as long as possible before the reality of adulthood and all the stresses and strains that THAT entails takes hold.
Perhaps the divorce has affected the child more than we realise, the last thing we should do as parents is make the situation worse by creating 2 sets of conflicting 'laws', the child then ends up with the best and worst of both worlds and ultimately may rebel against both.