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formspring.me

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/divorcedivorce

What Happens at a Divorce Workshop?

I have set up a series of divorce workshops to answer the questions you need answering when you are contemplating divorce:

What are my rights?

What are my choices?

Do I have to go to Court?

We have an agreement, what next?

What will happen to my children?

Should I move out of the house?

Will I have to get a job?

What is mediation?

Does mediation work?

A lot of questions people ask are similar and the workshops will give you the answers to help you decide what to do next. Very specific detail may require a follow up but we shall do our best to answer all questions as fully as possible.

Can I bring my mum?

Yes.

In dispute over taking your child to live abroad?

If an application to leave the Country ends up in Court how will the Court decide whether to let the parent leave with the child? The Court needs to consider a whole manner of information, not least the child's wishes and feelings.

In the past the case of Payne v Payne (2001) paid little attention to the effect of the removal on the child and the loss aspect. Instead it focused upon the effects on the Parent leaving and how a refusal would impact badly on the child via the parent's disappointment.

Payne is still binding on Judges who are entitled to find against the child leaving the Jurisdiction if it is considered the effect of the removal on the child and their relationship with the Parent who is left behind would cause greater harm to the child. Yet again, there is no straightforward answer. The views of the children will be more compelling the older the children are and, as with everything, children's views can change.

There is never a foregone conclusion in such proceedings, which can be traumatic.

What age can a child choose who to live with?

A recent case in the Court of Appeal re W(Children)refused permission to the Father to appeal against a High Court ruling which found that two children aged 8 and 6 had sufficient maturity in order for their views to be given priority.

In the past, the wishes and feelings of a child have always been taken into account in compliance with the Welfare Checklist, but the caveat is in accordance with their age and maturity,

Anecdotally, Social Workers have advised that children of 10 and above have a viewpoint which the Court is unlikely to ignore.

This case is surprising, given the extremely young age of the children.

Contrast this to another case before the Court of Appeal, widely reported, where a 13 year old boy has been ordered to live with his Father, despite having no contact with him and steadfastly refusing to do so. The Court considered that staying with the Mother would cause the child further emotional harm and the child has been placed in temporary foster care as he refuses to co-operate with the Court Agreement.

It would, therefore, appear that there is no such age at which a child's views carry priority. Each case is, therefore, judged upon its own facts. It is also difficult to judge on what basis a very young child makes their decision. Is it because one Parent allows them to stay up late and do as they please? Is it because one Parent buys them expensive gifts and takes them on expensive holidays?

Sometimes the children's wishes and feelings can be against their own best interests. I know my 7 year old Son would love to drive a car!

Want your ex back?

Some people can't get over a separation and desperately want a reconciliation.

If you have any chance at all remember:

Begging and Pleading is not attractive.

Needy is not sexy.

Aggression is scary.

Getting on with your life and being busy and happy is the best way to spark interest.

On no account keep calling, texting or turning up uninvited!!

The odds of being happily reunited are low so you need to make your best pitch and who knows pretending to be happy might just work!

What Makes a Good Dad?

A good Dad has these qualities:-

1. Kind.
2. Compassionate.
3. Provider.
4. Educator.
5. Role model.
6. Fairminded.
7. Available.
8. Patient.
9. Loving.
10. Respectful.

What Makes a Fantastic Dad?

1. Courageous.
2. Team builder.
3. Empathetic.
4. Fun.
5. Sporty.
6. Adventurous.
7. Non-judgemental.
8. Forgiving.
9. Relaxed.
10. Accomplished.

How many boxes do you tick?

Everyone should love and respect their own Dad to the extent that they consider he is accomplished at all of the above.

Being a Parent is the most important role anyone can ever have. Achieving it with style and grace is the best memory to leave when you are gone.

Never Ever?

Head spinning with questions?

This song sums up how people feel when going through Divorce

Join me on a Divorce Workshop to get the Answers