Monday, July 19, 2010

Ready to Leave?

I went out for a meal in the West End on Saturday night. It cost £80.00 for two including tip, the place was packed and the food and atmosphere were great. I went out for a meal to a Chinese restaurant in Hampshire last night it cost £90.00. We were the only two people in there and the food was mediocre. Which restaurant would you think was going to survive? I would say the London one, but what if their business rates and lease were costing more than they turned over?

What has this got to do with divorce? Just that everything is not as it seems on the outside. The Chinese restaurant probably should go out of business, it is overpriced, the food is not good and the result is an empty restaurant. It is a family run business so their overheads are probably low and they are all supporting each other. We all know marriages that struggle on and couples co existing in unhappiness for the sake of what? Their extended families? Money? Security? Fear of change?

There are also marriages which appear grounded but suddenly implode - think Tiger Woods.

Getting divorced is extremely stressful and can result in an avalanche of loss:

Loss of companionship
Loss of security
Loss of home
Loss of social life
Loss of status
Loss of mutual friends loyal to your ex
Loss of money

It can also result in

Loss of feeling that life is passing you by
Loss of living in a miserable atmosphere
Loss of irritation
Loss of having to compromise
Loss of fear
Loss of boredom

Unless of course you are prone to bitterness!!!


Jackie Walker said...

The article in yesterday's Telegraph was an excellent read, highlighting that there are often reasons which are overlooked when someone's making the decision whether to leave a marriage.

There are many things which can be done to save a relationship from divorce, it can be done just by the one person who is feeling aggrieved, or dis-satisfied.

I don't advocate that divorce is necessary, nor do I advocate staying together for the wrong reason, but I do believe strongly that a person be accutely aware of what they are doing before they chuck the baby out with the bath water.

At Ugli, we can help with all conflict situations - either with an individual or a couple.

Anonymous said...

Good point. Those who divorce expecting their lives to change for the better will be disappointed. The same as those who move house, job etc, they are still the same person. It is very important to understand why you are making the decision.

Anonymous said...

IS VERY GOOD..............................

Henna @ AboutDivorce Blog said...

you are right, its important to know that there are hundreds of things to be considered before going for a divorce, it seems eay to get one but living alone or without any support is better than some little support and love