Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Are you scared of your partner?

Is this you? Does he control what you eat? Who you see and what you wear? Does he control the remote, criticise your friends and family and expect you to do all the housework but complain about the creases in his shirts? Does he tell you that you are mad when you go crazy like a caged animal because he insists that you watch the football with him which you hate? Does he tell you off for being sulky when you are quiet and wary and for being boring when you tell him about your day? Do your friends and family love him? Is he charming in a room full of strangers, successful, affectionate towards you but manages to jokingly put you down in front of everyone? Does he make you feel unattractive in private but will punch a waiter for looking at you? Does he laugh at you when you try to explain how unhappy you are? Does he stand too close when he loses his temper? Do the children jump when they hear his voice?

Is this you? If it is read this book:

WHY DOES HE DO THAT?
Inside the minds of angry and controlling men
by Lundy Bancroft.


Then tell one person about your situation. Anyone, a friend , a solicitor, Citizens Advice, your GP, the police, but once you voice your fears you are one step towards changing your life for the better.

There are a minority of men out there who are similarly abused. Rather like male rape this is a taboo subject and the victim is undermined by being called henpecked. Unfortunately, the same advice applies to you. No matter how embarrassing, tell someone.. ...............

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

y ex husband is as described, calling me mad and crazy if I became angry at him. My children always went to their rooms when he came home. I told my doctor, my solicitor and th epolice when he hit me. Guess what I was labeled as paranoid and even a liar by my GP.My ex reminds me of this often where do you go when no_one believes you. I am a professional person and I like to think I am a reasonable person. He is currently taking me back to court because our house has not sold I am still terrified and I am in a very dark place at the moment.